Colony 41: Volume 2 (The Era Rae Series) by S.J. Taylor

Author:S.J. Taylor [Taylor, S.J.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: South Coast Publishing
Published: 2019-04-06T22:00:00+00:00

Era’s Journal, entry #3124

Would it surprise you to know we trained for tunnel warfare at the Academy?

We did. In fact, I’m pretty sure there wasn’t anything they didn’t prepare us for, in terms of combat. I can fight battles on several different fronts.

What my teachers never prepared me for was what to do with my emotions. It was just kind of understood that we wouldn’t have them, I think. If you felt sad, you kept it to yourself. If you were happy for someone you smiled at them and said 'good job’ or whatever and then went on with your day. If you loved someone…

You just didn’t.

Only, I’m a girl, and I’m sixteen now, and I have feelings. Feelings of attraction and need and love. How do I keep emotions like that from getting in my way? How do I keep from getting hurt by them?

I could have fought my way through Callesco’s painted children. I could have run back down the tunnel and found the spot where we had fallen through. It would have been hard to get back up but I would have managed it, somehow, and now that I knew what to look for I could even avoid the traps that had gotten us here in the first place.

In other words, I could have escaped. All I had to do was leave Jadran and Laria here. That’s what my Academy instructors would have expected me to do.

Only, I couldn’t make myself do it.

When the calm left me I was flooded with these feelings that nearly brought me to my knees. I was scared. I was angry. Shocked, too, because this man knew me. He knew my name.

Most of all, I was terrified that Callesco was actually going to pull that trigger and end Jadran’s life.

Maybe if it had been Laria standing there I would have felt different. I might have been able to leave her behind. Maybe not. I don’t know.

No. That’s a lie.

There, I said it. I’m lying. To you, and to myself. The emotions knotting in my chest weren’t there because Callesco was threatening just anyone’s life. Those feelings were there because he was threatening Jadran. That was what I was really feeling. It was like there was some invisible line attaching me to him, keeping me there, unable to leave without him.

I couldn’t run away and save myself, because I couldn’t leave without Jadran.

Because I still loved him.

Emotions surged in my chest and wrapped around my heart.

Hellfire.

What am I supposed to do now?

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